Coming to terms with my belly

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True story: I have never ever had a flat stomach, and probably never will.

Not even in high school – working out 2 hours a day 5-6 days a week. I have always had a little pouch right above my bikini line When I find a picture from my youth that accurately depicts it I will scan it and post it so you will see. Without extreme weight loss cornering on sickliness I will have a small fat deposit front and center. I share this with all y’all because I am at peace about it. And, as evidenced in the above belly shots of me this past summer, having babies has not helped me out any. But, here’s the truth: no one gets the ideal body. And, frankly I consider myself lucky because I’ve never been super self-conscious about my less-than-flat tummy. We all have things we like and don’t like about our bodies (for instance: i’m a pretty big fan of my hair and boobs. not a big fan of my thighs and flat feet). The struggle is to not wrap up SELF image with BODY image. Post-baby I feel myself growing healthier in this department. I will never be super skinny; this is not a bad thing. I will never have thighs that don’t touch; and this is not a bad thing. I will always have a little tummy pudge; and this is something I can live with. My goal cannot be this unattainable person who lives in another reality (read: gwyneth paltrow or blake lively – i have a thing for long limbed waify blonds) void of my hereditary tendency toward round butt, boobs and thighs. I can, however, be healthy and fit. My goal is to get back into MY kind of skinny jeans. Probably a size 12 for a while, then with a lot of work, size 10. To many of my friends, these are the sizes of their pregnancy fat jeans. This is what it is. Healthy body and self image means comparing myself to no one but myself. For me, size 10 is super thin. It is no small feat to make a baby inside of you. Again, it is no small feat to put humpty back together again. It takes a long time and a lot of work. Weight wise I am about 3 pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight. Solid, right!?!? But, grad school and becoming a 30 year old have done their fair share too. So now, now we work. Because I’m gonna meet my goals. I’m gonna look and feel like the most fit and healthy version of myself. And, she’s gonna be hawt.

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5 thoughts on “Coming to terms with my belly

  1. Love, love, love you Erin!

    For me, it’s been quite a transition into acceptance, I will not be the waif girl I was before, but that’s ok (only taken me 3 years to realize)! Oh and the belly (that’s where I am packing all the pounds), gosh that’s my main nemesis…w/o drastic measures it will never be gone and you know what? That’s alright(ish)!
    I had a good exercise plan going steadily and then life happened and I am having a hard time motivating myself to get back in there. It’s funny, because I want to look and feel good but am so very (oddly) stubborn!

    You are amazing for putting this out there!

  2. oh, girl. i hate those stretch mark genes. i got em something fierce; my sister- none?! so sad.

    this is a really great post- somehow i aspire to gwenyth and blake too, even though if you look at my genes that is never going to happen. plus i see my sweet girls, who are active & eat totally healthy built just like me. and i realize- oh, i can be healthy with what i have, who i am, and pass that sensibility onto my children.

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